Making friends sounds simple enough. For many of us, childhood friendships formed naturally on the playground or in the classroom. But for teens and young adults who are neurodivergent, socially anxious, or who simply never had the opportunity to develop strong social skills, building and maintaining friendships can feel overwhelming, confusing, and even painful. The desire for connection is there, but the roadmap to get there can seem unclear.
As a PEERS® certified provider, I have seen firsthand how transformative evidence-based social skills training can be. The Program for the Education and Enrichment of Relational Skills, known as PEERS®, is one of the most well-researched and effective social skills interventions available today. It was developed at the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior, and it has changed the lives of thousands of teens and young adults around the world. If you or someone you love struggles with making or keeping friends, understanding social cues, or navigating the complexities of social relationships, this article will help you understand what PEERS® is, how it works, and why it may be the right fit.
What Is the PEERS® Program?
PEERS® stands for the Program for the Education and Enrichment of Relational Skills. It is a structured, manualized social skills intervention originally developed by Dr. Elizabeth Laugeson and Dr. Fred Frankel at UCLA. The program was initially created to help adolescents with autism spectrum disorder develop meaningful social relationships, but over the years it has been expanded and adapted for young adults, as well as for individuals with ADHD, anxiety, depression, and other conditions that affect social functioning.
What sets PEERS® apart from other social skills programs is its strong foundation in research. It is one of the only evidence-based social skills interventions for teens and young adults, meaning that its effectiveness has been demonstrated through rigorous scientific studies published in peer-reviewed journals. Multiple randomized controlled trials have shown that participants in the PEERS® program experience significant improvements in social skills knowledge, social responsiveness, frequency of get-togethers with peers, and overall quality of friendships. These gains have been shown to be maintained months and even years after the program ends.
The program is typically delivered in a group format over the course of 14 to 16 weeks, with sessions lasting approximately 90 minutes each. There is a version designed for adolescents (typically ages 11 to 18) and a separate version designed for young adults (typically ages 18 to 35). Both versions follow a similar structure but address the unique social contexts and challenges relevant to each age group.
The Role of Social Coaches
One of the most distinctive features of the PEERS® program is the inclusion of social coaches. For the adolescent version, parents or caregivers attend concurrent parent sessions where they learn the same social skills their teen is learning. This allows parents to become informed social coaches who can support and reinforce their teen's skill development outside of the group setting. Parents learn how to provide gentle guidance, set up opportunities for socialization, and offer feedback without being overbearing or critical.
For the young adult version, participants may identify a social coach who can be a parent, sibling, partner, or trusted friend. The social coach's role remains the same: to help the participant practice and generalize the skills they are learning in the group to real-world settings. This coaching component is one of the reasons PEERS® produces lasting results. Social skills are not just learned in a clinical setting; they are practiced, reinforced, and refined in the participant's actual social world.
The social coach model also helps address one of the biggest challenges in social skills training, which is generalization. Many social skills programs teach concepts in a classroom-like environment, but participants struggle to apply those skills in the real world. By training social coaches alongside participants, PEERS® builds a support system that extends far beyond the group room.
What Do PEERS® Sessions Look Like?
Each PEERS® session follows a predictable and carefully designed structure. Sessions typically begin with a review of homework assignments from the previous week. Homework in PEERS® is not busywork; it involves real-world social tasks such as calling a peer on the phone, arranging a get-together, or practicing a specific conversational skill. Reviewing homework gives participants the chance to share their experiences, troubleshoot challenges, and celebrate successes.
After the homework review, the group leader introduces a new social skill through a combination of didactic instruction and interactive discussion. Skills are broken down into concrete, step-by-step rules that are easy to understand and remember. For example, rather than simply telling participants to "make good conversation," the program teaches specific rules such as trading information back and forth, finding common interests, and knowing when and how to gracefully exit a conversation.
Following the lesson, participants engage in behavioral rehearsal exercises, which are essentially structured role-plays. These exercises allow participants to practice the new skill in a safe and supportive environment before trying it out in the real world. The group leader and other group members provide feedback and encouragement, helping each participant refine their approach.
Sessions end with a new homework assignment that asks participants to practice the skill they just learned in their everyday life. The homework is designed to be manageable and achievable, building confidence through small, incremental steps. Over the course of the program, these small steps add up to significant social growth.
Core Skills Covered in the PEERS® Program
The PEERS® curriculum covers a comprehensive range of social skills that are essential for building and maintaining friendships. While the specific topics may vary slightly between the adolescent and young adult versions, the core skill areas include:
Conversational skills. Participants learn how to start conversations, maintain them through the exchange of information, and end them gracefully. They learn about the importance of finding common interests, asking follow-up questions, and sharing information about themselves in a balanced way. The program also addresses common conversational pitfalls such as being a "conversation hog" or an "interviewer" who asks too many questions without sharing.
Electronic communication. In today's world, much of social interaction happens through text messages, social media, and other digital platforms. PEERS® addresses how to use electronic communication appropriately, including how to start text conversations, how often to reach out, and how to interpret messages without jumping to negative conclusions.
Choosing appropriate friends. Not all friendships are healthy, and PEERS® helps participants learn how to identify people who would make good friends versus those who might not be a good fit. The program teaches participants to look for signs of mutual interest and shared values while also recognizing red flags such as peers who are consistently dismissive or unkind.
Using humor appropriately. Humor is a powerful social tool, but it can also backfire if used incorrectly. PEERS® teaches participants about different types of humor, when humor is appropriate, and how to gauge whether a joke has landed well. Participants learn the difference between laughing with someone and laughing at someone, and they practice using humor in ways that bring people together rather than pushing them apart.
Entering and exiting group conversations. Joining a conversation that is already in progress can be intimidating. PEERS® provides clear steps for how to approach a group, listen for a moment to understand the topic, and join in naturally without disrupting the flow. The program also teaches participants how to recognize when it is time to move on from a conversation.
Planning and hosting get-togethers. One of the most practical and impactful components of the program is the focus on arranging one-on-one get-togethers with peers. Participants learn how to extend invitations, plan activities that both people will enjoy, and be a good host or guest. These get-togethers are where friendships are truly built, and the program provides detailed guidance to make them successful.
Handling conflict and rejection. Every relationship encounters bumps along the way. PEERS® teaches participants how to handle disagreements without damaging the friendship, how to deal with teasing and bullying, and how to cope with the pain of social rejection. These skills are essential not just for building new friendships but for maintaining existing ones over time.
Managing rumors, gossip, and cyberbullying. The social world can sometimes be cruel, and PEERS® equips participants with practical strategies for navigating these challenges. The program addresses how to respond to rumors, how to handle gossip, and what to do when faced with cyberbullying or online harassment.
Who Benefits Most from PEERS®?
While PEERS® was originally developed for individuals on the autism spectrum, the program has proven to be effective for a wide range of people who struggle with social skills. The following groups tend to benefit most from the PEERS® approach:
Teens and young adults with autism spectrum disorder. This is the population for which PEERS® has the most extensive research support. Individuals on the spectrum often have a strong desire for social connection but may struggle with the unwritten rules of social interaction. PEERS® makes these implicit rules explicit and provides a clear framework for social success.
Individuals with ADHD. ADHD can affect social functioning in many ways, from difficulty sustaining attention in conversations to impulsive comments that may be misinterpreted by peers. PEERS® helps individuals with ADHD develop greater awareness of social norms and provides strategies for managing the social challenges associated with ADHD.
People with social anxiety. Social anxiety can make even simple interactions feel terrifying. PEERS® provides a supportive, structured environment where participants can practice social skills at their own pace. The gradual exposure to social situations, combined with concrete strategies and a supportive group, can help reduce social anxiety over time.
Individuals with other mental health conditions. Depression, learning disabilities, and other conditions can all affect social functioning. PEERS® has been used successfully with individuals who have a range of diagnoses, and its structured, skill-based approach makes it accessible to a wide variety of learners.
Anyone who struggles with social skills. You do not need a formal diagnosis to benefit from PEERS®. Some people simply did not have the opportunity to develop strong social skills during childhood, or they may have experienced social setbacks that eroded their confidence. PEERS® provides the tools and support needed to build social competence at any stage.
How PEERS® Differs from Other Social Skills Programs
There are many social skills programs and groups available, so it is worth understanding what makes PEERS® unique. First and foremost, PEERS® is evidence-based. This means that its effectiveness has been rigorously tested and validated through scientific research. Many other social skills programs rely on clinical experience or general best practices, which can be helpful but do not carry the same level of evidence.
Second, PEERS® teaches ecologically valid social skills. This means that the skills taught in the program reflect the way people actually interact in the real world. The developers of PEERS® spent extensive time observing how socially successful teens and young adults behave, and they used those observations to create the curriculum. The skills are not theoretical or aspirational; they are grounded in what actually works in everyday social situations.
Third, the inclusion of social coaches sets PEERS® apart from most other programs. By involving parents, caregivers, or other supportive individuals, PEERS® ensures that skill development does not stop when the group session ends. This built-in support system is critical for helping participants generalize their skills to new settings and maintain their gains over time.
Fourth, PEERS® uses concrete, step-by-step rules rather than abstract social concepts. Many social skills programs teach ideas like "be a good listener" or "show empathy," which are important but can be difficult to translate into specific behaviors. PEERS® breaks these broad concepts down into actionable steps that participants can follow and practice. This makes the program particularly effective for individuals who think in concrete or literal terms.
Finally, PEERS® addresses the full range of skills needed to build and maintain friendships, from initial conversations to long-term relationship maintenance. Many programs focus on only one aspect of social interaction, such as conversational skills or emotion recognition. PEERS® takes a comprehensive approach that covers the entire friendship-building process from start to finish.
The Evidence Behind PEERS®
The research supporting PEERS® is extensive and compelling. Studies have demonstrated improvements in social skills knowledge, social communication, social engagement, and the quality and frequency of peer interactions. Participants consistently report having more friends, spending more time with peers, and feeling more confident in social situations after completing the program.
Importantly, these gains have been shown to last well beyond the end of the program. Follow-up studies conducted one to five years after treatment have found that participants maintain their improvements in social functioning. This is a remarkable finding in the world of social skills interventions, where lasting change can be difficult to achieve.
Research has also shown that PEERS® produces improvements in areas beyond social skills. Participants have been found to experience reductions in symptoms of anxiety and depression, improvements in social anxiety, and increases in overall quality of life. Parents and caregivers also report reduced stress and greater confidence in their ability to support their child's social development.
The program has been studied across diverse populations and cultural contexts, and it has been adapted and translated for use in multiple countries around the world. This cross-cultural validation provides additional confidence that the skills taught in PEERS® are broadly applicable and effective.
What to Expect When Starting PEERS®
If you are considering PEERS® for yourself or your teen, the process typically begins with an intake assessment. This allows the provider to learn about the individual's social strengths and challenges, determine whether PEERS® is a good fit, and set goals for the program. The assessment may include interviews with the participant and their parents or social coach, as well as standardized questionnaires about social functioning.
Once accepted into the program, participants commit to attending all sessions and completing weekly homework assignments. Consistency is important because each session builds on the skills taught in previous sessions. Missing sessions can make it difficult to keep up with the group and may reduce the overall benefit of the program.
It is normal for participants to feel nervous at the beginning, especially if they have had negative social experiences in the past. The group environment is designed to be supportive and non-judgmental, and the structured format helps reduce the unpredictability that can trigger social anxiety. Most participants find that their initial nervousness fades quickly as they begin to connect with other group members who share similar experiences.
Taking the Next Step
Friendship is not a luxury; it is a fundamental human need. Loneliness and social isolation are associated with significant negative effects on both mental and physical health. If you or your teen is struggling to build meaningful social connections, know that this is not a character flaw or something that cannot be changed. Social skills can be learned at any age, and the PEERS® program provides a proven pathway to stronger, more fulfilling relationships.
As a certified PEERS® provider, I am passionate about helping teens and young adults develop the social skills they need to thrive. There is nothing more rewarding than watching a participant who started the program feeling isolated and discouraged gradually build confidence, make new friends, and experience the joy of genuine social connection.
If you think PEERS® might be right for you or your family, I encourage you to reach out. A brief consultation can help determine whether the program is a good fit and answer any questions you may have. Building meaningful friendships is possible, and you do not have to figure it out alone.